Christmas this year was an eye opener for my family. There were games and Tonie figures and puzzles for the girls (I admit the theme of "not just dolls for the girls" has already gotten to everyone) and cars and tools for the boys. So what did the kids play with for the next few days? With everything! Girls and boys. The girls also found the cars and tools super exciting. Especially the 3-year-old forgot all her own toys when she saw the car to assemble and the tow truck.
Why we don't give cars to girls.
We all have conscious or unconscious prejudices. Even if we don't want to have them. It's hard for us to get over them. What if we gave little Mia a blue t-shirt with a car on it for her birth? What would the parents say? Would they think we didn't know Mia was a girl? Would they put the t-shirt on her?
The older children become, the more they experience gender stereotypes themselves. The expectation of adults, the stories in children's books, the Christmas presents, the other children.... Many small, everyday things show our children "what is meant for them" and what is not.
What can we do to ensure that our girls are also given cars?
1. Make conscious purchases ourselves
We should ask ourselves every time: Does the girl need a(nother) doll or does she (also) like to play with Legos, cars or robots? I also consistently try to give something atypical for birthday presents for other children. It doesn't have to be pink pajamas for baby Elias.
2. Communicate clearly with others
Especially relatives often ask what our girls want. This is a good time to bring up the subject. Even if you don't have to lecture the grandparents about gender roles right away (maybe it still takes some time for them to give up their old patterns).
3. Sensibilize our daughters
What should we do if all our daughter ever wants is dolls and princess dresses? There is nothing wrong with giving our children a doll. However, I personally believe that the added value of a second, third or fourth doll is not the same. Children sometimes don't even know what other options are available.
I'm not saying that we should deny our children their wishes, but that we can show them options of what other great gifts are out there. And all of a sudden our daughter would rather have headphones and not a doll after all.
Our relatives saw very clearly this year at Christmas that gender-stereotypical gifts are much more present than expected. And I almost dare to bet that next time there will also be a car for the girls...
Who is Mint Girls?
Mint Girls makes clothes for girls who think astronauts, trucks and dragons are great. We want to empower our girls and give them the opportunity to have alternatives to princesses and unicorns.